I have been doing alot of thinking the last couple of days...about my life so far. So many ups and downs. I think what the real deal is...is that there were probably more ups than downs I just did'nt realize that we were in an "up" time. I thought it was a down time. OR maybe I made it a down time because I was having "brain junk" going on...you know..."everything is bad because it's not what I want..."
(stupid, stupid brain....why do I even have a brain..........wait...)
(stupid, stupid brain....why do I even have a brain..........wait...)
The girls and I were talking the other day about being a stay-at-home mom vs. a working-mom
---wait---it has to be said that I hate that verbage. I worked my butt off, I just happened to do it while I was being a mother at home. Anyway, It seems to still be a concern....are you valid as a person if all you do is mother? I remember wrestling with this question in my own mind...trying to find validation. In hind sight I know that it was the best blessing that could possibly have been...but I don't know if I appreciated it as much as I should have.
I remember being overwhelmed alot...I don't think I was a great mother of small children. I wasn't very patient. But I do remember having fun with them all...and I do remember thinking how much I loved them, and I know I prayed about them constantly. I hope that counts for something.
---wait---it has to be said that I hate that verbage. I worked my butt off, I just happened to do it while I was being a mother at home. Anyway, It seems to still be a concern....are you valid as a person if all you do is mother? I remember wrestling with this question in my own mind...trying to find validation. In hind sight I know that it was the best blessing that could possibly have been...but I don't know if I appreciated it as much as I should have.
I remember being overwhelmed alot...I don't think I was a great mother of small children. I wasn't very patient. But I do remember having fun with them all...and I do remember thinking how much I loved them, and I know I prayed about them constantly. I hope that counts for something.
I am definitely guilty of thinking or looking to the future or the past instead of in the moment.
ReplyDeleteI dont think much about me feeling less of a woman by not being a career woman. What I do struggle with is comparing myself to other moms that seem to do it all so much better than myself.
Bottom line: there isn't ANYTHING I'd rather be doing than what I am.
Sometimes I'd just like to be doing it better... or wish I could travel more... or wish I looked a little more presentable when I'm doing what I'm doing!
Love ya denise - glad K showed me your awesome blog!
Hi jaime...i'm glad you found me, too!
ReplyDeleteSOOO many lessons learned through hind-sight for me...
keep up the "good" work..that is the "mother work"
love you
denise
oh I've always loved that pic of Kindle so so cute.
ReplyDeleteI finally got to the point of saying, "...To hell with the house, get in the car were going on a 'Mom adventure'!
ReplyDeleteThe house was a mess, dishes in the sink, etc....but, dang, we had fun!